Are you Married to a Single-Guy?

Take the Single-Married-Mom Quiz and See How Your Guy Scores

First, let’s define what a single-guy is. He is your husband, best friend, a terrific father, provider and all out good sport. You are not newlyweds anymore and still very much in love. The kids love him. Even your mother-in-law loves him. Life is good. So what are we talking about here?

Your single-guy lives on the planet Guy. Keeping in mind that he was years in the making before you came along, the shift to married life occurs slowly, like the continental drift. He is an ace with numbers but has never quite gotten the meaning of 50%. He is accomplished in recalling specific scores of particular players on exact dates but can’t find the container in the cabinet that has been kept in the same place for ten years. He can find a fishing lure the size of a dime at the bait and tackle shop but can’t find the canned beans on the grocery store shelf. He keeps a complex calendar of meetings and events at work but relies on you to call him with a reminder when it is back-to-school night.

Want to know how your single-guy stacks up? Answer these 12 questions and then add up your score for the results. (Scoring is easy. Score one point for As, two points for Bs, three points for Cs and four points for Ds. Add them up and you have your total).

1. Your guy has been asked to volunteer to be a board member at a charitable organization
   1. He immediately accepts and offers to be president
   2. He accepts the position and tells you when he gets home
   3. He accepts but only because he’s resigning off another board
   4. He tells them he’ll have to check with his family and get back to them

2. He goes to the grocery store on the way home from work to pick up four items.
   1. He picks up 4 items, 3 of which you’ve never seen before in your house.
   2. He calls you three times to clarify what to get
   3. He calls you once then asks the grocery clerk for help
   4. He picks up the 4 items plus 3 more things he knows the family needs

3. Your husband has volunteered to stay home with the kids so you can have a night out with your girlfriends. On your way out the door you ask him what the plan is for dinner.
   1. He looks up vaguely from his computer. “Is that tonight?”
   2. “McDonalds.” He sees your expression. “Taco Bell?”
   3. “Fish sticks and French fries.” He smiles. “And carrots, of course.”
   4. “We’re grillin’,” he says, “and if they’re good we all get frozen yogurt.”

4. He surprises you by getting tickets to a show for your birthday, which falls on a weeknight.
   1. He gets home from work five minutes before it’s time to go and says, “ready?”
   2. He gets home an hour before it’s time to leave to check the mail and grab a bite to eat with the kids.
   3. He calls you from work to see if you need any help
   4. Before buying the tickets he arranged for a babysitter and says not to worry about dinner, he’s got it all figured out

5. It’s garbage night
   1. He looks up from his paper, “Isn’t that the kids’ job?”
   2. He gets home from work and sees the neighbors cans out on the curb. “Come on kids, garbage night,” he calls out to an empty living room.
   3. He finds the kids in their rooms relaxing and tells them to get their garbage out, “Now,” he smiles. “And don’t forget the bathrooms.”
   4. He plays a game with the kids to see who can collect the most garbage and take it outside fastest. Winner gets ice cream. The kids tie for first place.

6. It’s Saturday and you are rushing to make PB&J sandwiches between activities.
   1. He walks into the kitchen with keys in hand and says it’s time to go.
   2. He sees that you’re rushed and offers to help. As you get the cooler, spare clothes and water bottles he fires, “Where’s the peanut butter? What bread do we use? Do we have any sandwich bags?”
   3. He offers to help, picking up the jar of all natural peanut butter. “Hmmm,” he muses. “I didn’t know the kids liked this stuff.” He turns on the kitchen TV and starts making sandwiches.
   4. He made the PB&J sandwiches that morning along with bags of cut up apples doused in lemon juice to keep them fresh. It’s all in the frig.

7. Your husband and three buddies have attended spring break in Arizona all of their adult unmarried lives.
   1. He continues to book his trip every year and knows you will remember.
   2. He puts it on the calendar in the new year and reminds you that it’s coming up.
   3. He has hinted to the guys that it might be time to make it a family event.
   4. He tells the guys the family is really looking forward to the trip this year.

8. Dinner is over and you are cleaning up.
   1. He starts talking with a neighbor over by the azaleas.
   2. He talks to the neighbor while watering the garden.
   3. He dries the dishes you are washing, placing them on the counter the way guests do when they don’t know where anything goes.
   4. He starts putting food in containers, finds the matching lids and sweeps the floor.

9. It’s open house night at school.
   1. He asks, “Do we go to that?”
   2. “Which one is that?” he asks. “The conferences or when you learn about their teachers?”
   3. He has it on his calendar and will meet you there. “What room is it again?”
   4. He calls you from the school to tell you he’s there waiting for you.

10. He brings you home flowers (I told you he was a good guy).
    1. He sets them on the dining room table where the kids are doing homework and you’re writing checks, wetting the papers and tablecloth.
    2. He asks, “Where should I put these?”
    3. He offers to put them in a vase if you can get one out for him.
    4. He brings the flowers home in a vase with a gorgeous satin bow in your favorite color.

11. You’re reading in bed at night with a small reading light on
    1. He comes in, turns on the TV and starts brushing his teeth with an electric toothbrush in the middle of the room.
    2. While brushing his teeth he asks, with the remote in hand, if you’d mind if he turns on the news
    3. He paces the room, brushing his teeth, fiddling through papers and drawers
    4. He disappears into the bathroom then goes to the living room to watch the news

12. You’re seated between the kids on a rough flight landing in Phoenix ahead of a monsoon when you and the kids start not feeling well.
    1. He reads the paper, unfazed by the turbulence, while a kind soul seated behind you reaches through the seats to hand you a tissue.
    2. He looks over to see if you and the kids are okay but doesn’t register your panic.
    3. He takes a look over and starts helping with your youngest.
    4. He switches seats with you.

 

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RESULTS

 

Scores 1 – 12

You must love your husband very much! Sure, he’s a good guy but perhaps leaning too much toward the single side. Maybe he could “accidentally” find this quiz in his inbox for a nudge in the right direction. Take heart though — at least he brings you flowers.

 

Scores 13 – 24

Clueless is a bit strong for this category so let’s call it unaware. If you are in a fairly young marriage take comfort in the years to come. It takes time for the single guy to acclimatize — recall the movement of tectonic plates.

 

Scores 24 – 36

Now we’re talking! Lucky you. The guy you married is the guy you married plus!

Truth is, we don’t want them to change, we just want Single Guy 4.0., the newest most improved version. Last thing you want is to lose all that you loved in him in the first place.

 

Scores 37 – 48

Really? No cheating now. If you’ve checked your answers and this is your score then you are not married to a single guy, which puts you in a select group. You have Married Guy Version 1.0 or better, a distinctly new category that, frankly, no one has ever heard of. There is no record of such an individual in existence, no precedent for what to do under such circumstances, so just relax and enjoy and when he’s asleep check to see if his skin unzips or he has antennae beneath the surface of his head.